November 17

Christopher Audette on How Positive Mindset is Key to Success


My name is Chris Audette, I am the founder of The Group at Remax First, a top producing real estate team that helps builders, buyers and sellers.

Were best known for our brokerage which is the #1 Re/Max office Worldwide (for closed transactions for the past 2 years), our international award winning marketing (which helps build perceived value for home sales) and 2 popular and well known listing websites, www.real-estate.ca and www.new.ca (which helps build awareness with buyers, and helps buyers connect with potential homes in an easy to use format). Although not known for this, the most important part is that we do this through a very process driven approach.

[Podcast Transcript Using Artificial Intelligence]

Umar Hameed 0:01
Are you ready to become awesomer? Hello everyone! My name is Umar Hameed, I'm your host on the No Limits Selling Podcast where industry leaders share their tips, strategies and advice on how you can become better, stronger, faster. Just before we get started, I've got a question for you, do you have a negative voice inside your head? We all do, right? I'm gonna help you remove that voice and under 30 days guaranteed, not only remove it, but transform it. So instead of the voice that sabotages you, there's one that propels you to much higher levels of performance and success. There's a link in the show notes, click on it to find out more. All right! Let's get started.

Umar Hameed 0:41
Hey everybody! Super excited to have Chris Audette here. He is the head honcho at The Group. Chris, welcome to the show.

Christopher Audette 0:49
Very glad to be here. Thank you for having me, Umar.

Umar Hameed 0:52
Superb! One of the reasons I'm excited to have you here is before you became a realtor and started building a team and doing amazing things, that you were actually doing lead generation for realtor. So you got to play with a whole bunch of realtors so it gives you a unique perspective on the industry and how to build a kick-ass amazing team.

Christopher Audette 1:11
Yeah, well, we've definitely gained some insights from it. I don't know that we're the leaders in doing it but we've had a lot of, a lot of successes. And frankly, we've had a lot of failures as well, and some of those failures, were the things that really catapulted our successes up a little bit further.

Umar Hameed 1:26
Doesn't feel like it when you're going through the failure, though, does it?

Christopher Audette 1:29
At the time, it's pretty tough to see, yes. You know, having said that, I've looked back among many things that have happened in my lifetime. And the biggest, boldest and best lessons usually have been certain circumstances around the the biggest failures. So it's, it's a journey that you can take and you can prosper from or, or you can kind of revel in and and have it affect you in negative ways. Think positive.

Umar Hameed 1:56
What's kind of interesting is when people you know, are giving advice, it's like, "Hey, you know, it's perfectly natural to fail. And when you fail, it's not a failure, it's a learning experience," and it sounds like, "Are you kidding me?" Because intellectually, we understand it but when you're going through it, you feel it viscerally in your body, and all those inner voices that were telling you, you're no good actually get louder, and you start believing the more.

Christopher Audette 2:19
Yeah, those inner voices can be pretty loud, for sure. But you know, I think it really has a lot to do with how you look at the circumstances that are happening around you, and the level of accountability that you take into it as well. You know, there are very few things that happen to us, we typically co-create the situations in our, in our lives. And if you can look at that, then you can get a lot of power from it. You can lose power, you can get power away, but you can also gain the power behind it and just looking at it without blame. You know, and I think that's the key is, is being accountable without without blaming someone or blaming yourself or blaming the market, it's just doing it without, without blame.

Umar Hameed 2:56
You know what's kind of curious to me is this, if you got Person A going to go buy a car at a car dealership, oftentimes, they'll show up a lot more meeker and milder and wimpier. But if friends taking them to help them buy a car, then they're like freaking lions, and they're like, so powerful. And then the reason I bring that up is oftentimes on the failures that we have, we are so cruel to ourselves, had a friend gone through it with a gun, "Listen Chris, A you're not dead and B you know, you help do this but you can overcome this," and we have more compassion for other people than ourselves. Have you ever noticed that?

Christopher Audette 3:31
Very much. So I'd say that's probably the common thread and you know, 90% of the people out there. I guess the two ends of the spectrum, you're a narcissist or you're not?

Umar Hameed 3:43
Yeah. So tell me about one of the times Chris, where you fell down where you failed, and how you got back up again? Because oftentimes, it's not instantaneous, it's a process. So can you think of a specific time where you failed? And then it's like, this is how I got back in action?

Christopher Audette 3:59
Yeah, you know, I'll give you the one that we're going through right now. And how..

Umar Hameed 4:02
Talking to me? No, no, not talking to me, it's another thing.

Christopher Audette 4:06
Yeah, no, no, definitely not this right, right, right now, but I mentioned that we started the business as a lead generation company. And we we started taking off very, very quickly. We were front runners in a field that was very far behind current technology. Because of that, it allowed me to be lacks. So I was lacks in my business structure, I was lacks in the website development that I was doing, which was kind of the foundation the mainstay of our, of our company, and we still prospered. Well, I prospered in a very passive way. You know, in being lacks, I knew it would come up to bite me at one point. However it was in the future. And I think when we look at things that are in the future, they're very less pressing, we're really willing to put up with a lot of negatives for the future as long as we're not seeing them, you know, right now in the present and, and having to sacrifice now, so that you know that that delay is is kind of key in our, in our lives. Our site has been suffering on the rankings for the past, about a year and a half. And it's been a long toil and trouble to get it back there. However, you know, if I look at that in an unaccountable way, damn, you know, I wish I wasn't such an idiot, and so lazy and just, you know, kind of sat back and let it all happen. But if I look at it in an accountable way, which is, you know, doing it without blame, it's like, well, that was silly, I'm never gonna do that, again, I'm gonna stay on top of this stuff. And the things that I'm learning now, because I was pushed down into the lower edges of it are pretty amazing, that I think are going to catapult us to the top again, in a very, very substantial way, and keep us there for quite a bit longer as well, so long as they don't fall into that complacency again.

Umar Hameed 5:50
Yeah, those lessons are really important. And what's kind of interesting, what you're chatting about is, let's say, for some unknown reason, Chris, you were like being a dick to me right now. And at that point,

Christopher Audette 5:59
That's what I am actually.

Umar Hameed 6:00
Yeah, at that point, I'd go, you know, "Chris is a bad guy, Chris is evil, Chris is horrible," and I'm giving you all the power. And if I looked at it, even if it was not true, what did I do to contribute to this? It puts me back in control, even if it's not true, as long as it's useful. And I think in this world, we have tools that are absolutely correct. And sometimes we have tools that are actually are misplaced, but they're still useful to us. A good example could be is like, you know, I am going to use this dating profile to go find mates, even if that profile was totally flawed and I found the right person, who cares, as long as I found the right person. And so I think being at cause, which is I take responsibility for this, even if it's not true, it's so useful in keeping us in control.

Christopher Audette 6:47
Yeah, I couldn't agree more. And it's funny, as you say that, something that strikes me as a conversation I had with a friend, not all that long ago, and the basic premise of it was, does it serve you? You know, that's great, but does it serve you it might be good might be bad? It might be whatever you feel it is, at the time, but at the end of the day, does it serve you? To think you're beautiful, think you're ugly, to think you're smart to think you're not, to think this person is doing this to you or life is this? At the end of the day just does? Does it serve you? Does it, does it help you in your life's goals? Or does it, does it hinder you, and if it hinders you, maybe you should look at altering your perception of it.

Umar Hameed 7:26
I was watching this TV Show with James Cameron, the guy that did Avatar and Titanic. And he was talking about a word that you really love. And he said, "I love the word can't," because it switches on something within me, that gets me to prove them wrong.

Christopher Audette 7:41
Right? That's, you know, that's a really good point. And that whole can't thing, really just, it kind of stops your brain from looking for solutions.

Umar Hameed 7:48

Christopher Audette 7:49
I remember, sorry to interrupt, I remember a number of years ago, this was actually the catalyst in the in the start of the company that became quite successful, is I was talking to major tech company here in, in Calgary, Alberta, Canada. And we came to them looking for a solution to a web problem that we have and they said, "You can't do it. It just it can't be done." I walked away from there and I was talking to CEO, so it's kind of one of the big leagues on it, I walked away from there and I thought, "I don't quite believe that so I'm going to Google things." And I Googled a programmer who for $120, gave me the perfect solution to what I was looking for. And I went to, to pay him in his small modest home. And you know, the guy in the big mansion, who's running a major tech company in Calgary here said ,"Can't, we can't do it," by not trusting in that and finding someone else who could, you know,

Umar Hameed 8:45

Christopher Audette 8:46
sold, it's, it's funny that that word is so so big. And I can see why it would be one of his favorites as well.

Umar Hameed 8:52
Yeah, and the word is so small, but has a big impact like can't, it's just four letters with an apostrophe. What's kind of interesting is when I'm working with people, sometimes they'll go, "I can't do that," and then what I say is, "Of course, you can't, but if you could, how would that look like?" If the person says, "I can," you said, "Sure you can," you try and force them to like dig in. But if you say, if they say, "I can't," say, "Of course you can't, but if you could, what would that look like that?" Well, if I could, it would look like and they just describe exactly what they need to be doing to make it happen. So oftentimes, that word can't stops you in the track, and if you can get over it, it becomes a jumping board to doing something amazing.

Christopher Audette 9:34
I love the way you agree with them first, you know, putting yourself on their side and kind of just jarring them a little bit, I'm sure is actually probably a catalyst to really get their mind kind of invoked in the conversation and starting up with you.

Umar Hameed 9:47
I had this, I had this woman bring her daughter and her daughter was about nine years old, 10 years old, and they had the Maryland State Assessment, that's in elementary school. You know what you're going do in life in terms of university or not, so it's this test. And she discovered that a daughter didn't have a learning disability, it was test anxiety, so she brings her in to see me the day before the test. And so she's sitting with me her mom's next door, and I go, "You got a major test tomorrow, right?" She goes, "Yeah," and I go, "You're probably going to fail, right?" And the moms like, "What are you talking about? You're supposed to tell her she's like made of stars," and this little girl goes, "Ah, yeah," and then I pause, and then I go, "Well, unless we figure something out different, right?" And instead agreement, people kind of get dug into their reality of the world. If you try and fight it, they'll push back. But if you agree with them for a moment, and then offer the possibility of change, oftentimes, they'll go on the journey with you. And that kind of brings me to this, Chris, you've got a team of right now about nine real estate agents in your team?

Christopher Audette 10:52
Nine agents? That's correct. Yep.

Umar Hameed 10:54
I'm clairvoyant folks, and so on one of those agents don't name names, or other people you were leading in the past? Who was someone that you looked at, and you saw something in them that was spectacular, amazing, and they couldn't see it in themselves? And how did you coax them to kind of realize that they could do so much more?

Christopher Audette 11:14
That's a good question. That's a tough question to be perfectly frank. You know, I wouldn't, I wouldn't consider myself a great person in invoking others, but I will speak authentically and passionately what I am authentic and passionate about.

Umar Hameed 11:29

Christopher Audette 11:30
I think that allows others to do the same. And I have definitely been fortunate enough to work, you will let me put it this way, I think other people have affected me, more than I have affected other people, I have been extremely fortunate in my life, to have some very amazing people surround me. And I've chosen to see what is amazing about them, you know, I guess in that I allow them to grow and to support themselves and to, to, to there's, there's that old expression, "You don't know what you don't know."

Umar Hameed 12:05

Christopher Audette 12:05
And there's another expression that's very important too, "You don't know what you do know." And I think just that, that agreeance, like you're talking about, so that agreeance with people and then expanding on things in questioning in a very, you know, laboratory and sort of way, you know, just naturally curious as to what they think allows people to actually bring out in themselves, what they, what they've already got in there, they just didn't really realize that that power and that strength, was there. Very similar to what you were just talking about with? Of course, you can't.

Umar Hameed 12:34

Christopher Audette 12:36
But is going to be my most favorite word.

Umar Hameed 12:38
Yeah. And I was working with this team, actually, in Baltimore, Maryland. And so it's working with each of their agents, and they all had their own issues. And this one guy was ready to quit. He says, "You know, hey, I'm not earning much. I've been doing this for a while," and he didn't tell me that. But we figured out what the block was, one part of his psyche knew he could be great at this industry. And another unconscious part of his, his makeup was, you don't deserve to be successful. He had a problem with drugs in the past, and somewhere I believe got formed, that you'll never amount to much or you don't deserve. And we kind of resolve that in the first session and three weeks into the program, he's got this amazing testimonial that, you know, this month, "I've got nine listings. I didn't have any at the beginning of the month, and you just helped me believe in myself." And we got that part of his psyche that was sabotaging him because we all have that part in different areas, in different degrees of strength, that sometimes we don't accept who we truly deeply are and we're frickin' amazing.

Christopher Audette 13:43
Yeah, yeah, you know, I think we've all got a small version of us in a big version of us.

Umar Hameed 13:49

Christopher Audette 13:49
And really, what do we choose to be in any given moment, Do I choose to be the bigger person, the big the big, the bigger version of me, the more powerful you know, self owning person? Or are the person is going to play little? Am I going to do this podcast or not? Do I have something to contribute? Well, maybe. maybe not for 90% of it. But maybe one little nugget just is that so I'm going to be the bigger me and I'm going to, I'm going to be part of this, of this podcast, because Umar's giving me this opportunity.

Umar Hameed 14:14
One of things that I really find fascinating is no matter which army what time in history anywhere in the world, you get a group of strangers coming together in basic training. And they go through basic training, and bond into a platoon. And in that platoon when they get there, they may not do anything for the general, other than follow orders, because they have to, but for each other, they'll take a bullet, they will risk their lives for each other. Because when you bond as a team, that you do extraordinary things for other people. So oftentimes, I may not do something for myself, but if you were part of my team, and you were counting on me, I would go above and beyond the call of duty to do that. And the reason I queue that up and frame that up is this, is that Chris, your job as the leader of your team, part of it is this, is because you believe in yourself so strongly, and the journey you guys are on that it allows the people you're leading if you're doing it right, to borrow some of your certainty and your trust, and go discover themselves and do extraordinary things. Does that statement make sense or does this sound like BS?

Christopher Audette 15:22
Well, part of me says it sounds like BS.

Umar Hameed 15:24
No, no.

Christopher Audette 15:25
And that's it.

Umar Hameed 15:26
Tell me that.

Christopher Audette 15:27

Umar Hameed 15:27
So part of you says that?

Christopher Audette 15:29
And that's the negative, the negative side of one shoulder, I guess.

Umar Hameed 15:32

Christopher Audette 15:33
We've always got these two, these two birds on the on, on our shoulders, and once shipping out us with the negative self talk and, and the others talking on us with the positive and depending on which moment here, you talk to me, I'm gonna believe either of them.

Umar Hameed 15:46
Yeah. One or the other. Absolutely.

Christopher Audette 15:48
Yeah. And I really just kind of hope that the positive one wins out more often than the negative one. And I think if we can do that, then we're going to be a little bit ahead but the more you kind of even look at the negative one, and then well, you can't do this, well, I can do this I can be the bigger me so am I going to do it in the moment. I guess would be kind of just a nice little challenge to your to yourself and not listen to that.

Umar Hameed 16:11
So like my background is very much neuroscience and kind of what's what's kind of interesting is this is that negative voice isn't there in isolation, there is a belief somewhere in the unconscious that got created somewhere that's driving this negative voice. And we can try and shut that voice up, and sometimes we're successful, but it doesn't go away unless we uncover the underlying driver for it. And when we can go down to the underlying driver, and make peace with that, and the voice just goes away, which is like spectacular. But, but going back to you know, leveraging you as a leader, what really brought it into sharp focus for me was this. I was doing something for charity. It was rappelling down a 28-storey building to raise money for the National Kidney Foundation. And it all sounded really good and super exciting when I was thinking about it. But when I was on the building with the harness, and I looked down 28 stories, all of a sudden, I was like, "Holy crap, I don't know these people that are rigging me up? who they are? how good they are?" And I suddenly realized the reason I'm doing it is because I trust, the director of the National Kidney Foundation. And my trust for her is being leveraged by these people doing the rigging. And oftentimes, here's the job of the leader I think this three fold, number one is to have a kick-ass amazing vision that people go, "I want to be a part of this.

Christopher Audette 17:33

Umar Hameed 17:34
The second thing is a culture. How do we build a culture with people? It's not about me and my selfishness. It's about how can I as be part of this team and help the team succeed? And that's part of that leadership and trust. And the third one is, you know, how do you create long term shareholder value? So how do you make your company The Group more and more profitable as you go? So no pressure, Chris, cut it, that's your job, right?

Christopher Audette 18:00
No pressure at all? None whatsoever. I said,

Umar Hameed 18:03
Go ahead, please.

Christopher Audette 18:04
You know, I think that that culture aspect has been a common theme that keeps coming back to me anyway, over and over and over and over and over and over and over again. And it usually from the big, massive leaders that I've been fortunate enough to have in my life, you know, that I've used as inspiration. And they just keep saying that hire for culture, hire for culture, hire for culture, surround yourself with people who have a common vision, not necessarily the same, you know, thoughts and ideals, but the same morals and values at the very least.

Umar Hameed 18:35
So we're inherently selfish as human beings.

Christopher Audette 18:39
I agree with that.

Umar Hameed 18:39
So you know, I want you to look after myself, and you know, in your marketing things is like, you know, basically, "what's in it for me," kind of mentality. So what we need to do is to get people to let go of that and be part of the team in a way where it's being selfless. So what we need to do is to figure out what beliefs are inherent in the team that cause these behaviors. Because some agents, you may have some of these, that they will put their foot on the gas, till they get a certain level of success. And then they take the foot off the gas, and they start coasting. And they just kept their foot on the gas to kind of go over the 40-hum threshold a year and opposite and go to the 60/80. But something in their makeup or you've got other people that, you know, if it's not their idea, they're not going to support it. They may say, "Yeah, yeah," but they won't do it. So how do we create a culture where people go, "I need to be strong enough when something's not right to speak up. I need to be courageous enough when somebody points a finger at me that I don't react that I kind of go, what are you seeing and we discuss it." When we get an organization like that it makes your job easier. Because all that human interaction stuff just goes away that conflict, and all of a sudden people like rolling up their sleeves saying, "Okay, alright, Chris, what's next? What is the next hill? What do we need to do? How do we actually have the same look and feel to our customers," like people or individuals, but they kind of go, "Wow, these guys really care, these guys are driven, I gotta tell all my neighbors and my friends, if you're going to do a transaction, you got to go to The Group."

Christopher Audette 20:12
Well, you don't, I think they tie in very closely together, you know, that's that all scarcity versus abundance mentality.

Umar Hameed 20:19

Christopher Audette 20:19
You know, in our world, an agent doing more doing less, I remember having a conversation with a realtor who's very capable of doing 100 deals a year. And I think when I word it to him like that, he was scared of the success that that would have and scared of what that would mean in his life. So he wanted to knock that down to 35, which is unbelievably achievable for this for this realtor, but very, very high in our market. Rewording it though to I would like to see you helping 100 families per year succeed in their goals, really kind of changed, changed things for this particular person, because it was a very giving person. And although he wanted the success and sort of, you know, there was still a scarcity mentality behind it of, you know, there's not enough time, there's not enough money there, I'm not necessarily good enough to do this. But if we reworded that, because it was a very giving person once again, to helping others than you know, there's a mutual success that can serve behind it,

Umar Hameed 21:17
Chris, I wrote that down, because that was like frickin' genius. The you know, I'd like to see you help...

Christopher Audette 21:21
Helping you [garbled]

Umar Hameed 21:21
Yeah. I'd like to see you help 100 families, all of a sudden, it goes back to that car example of going to negotiate, we go for ourselves that we suck at it. But if I'm going to help 100 families, who am I to get in the way of that, and all of a sudden it steps them up. And so totally genius. So Chris, before we part company today, what's the mind hack or trick that you use to get more productivity or happiness or success in your life?

Christopher Audette 21:45
Ah, you know what, I'm gonna go with this, this one might a little bit off kilter. But I've got an expression, "Great, this is what happens next." It's about taking control back into the process, into our relationships, always agreeing, first, let me give you a small example of this, because I was like this example that I use often, "Chris, your raving idiot, and we don't want to work with you anymore." "Great, fantastic. I get, I get we're not we're not seeing eye to eye, we're going to go for coffee, and we're going to explore what's going on here and if we should be working together, if we shouldn't be working together, or how we change your relationship, so that it does work mutually for them for the two of us." You know, always starting with great, always starting on that agreement side and then kind of leading into that that discussion.

Umar Hameed 22:34
The possibility, yeah.

Christopher Audette 22:36
The possibilities at all that would how that can...

Umar Hameed 22:37
I love that. I also like the shorter version of it for our own issues, you know, "You sucked at the marathon, you gave up."

Christopher Audette 22:45

Umar Hameed 22:45
Great, what's next? next time you get better condition, next thing I need to do is do this. And so totally genius. And is there a book that you would recommend that people read?

Christopher Audette 22:54
You don't, yes, there is, um, "Reframe your Blame" by Jay Fiset. It's a book about accountability that he really breaks down the six levels of. I would say it's probably the best self help book that I've read, and I actually know the author. And I don't just say that, you know, it's the best self help book because I know him. I truly legitimately think it's a, it's an amazing book, and it's probably one of the golden gems out there that's very few heard of so. I've seen it on Amazon fairly recently.

Umar Hameed 23:25
Excellent. And, Chris, if you can do an introduction, we'd love to have him on the show, because that would be like a brilliant topic to chat about.

Christopher Audette 23:30
Yes, absolutely. I think it'd be spectacular to have on the show.

Umar Hameed 23:33
Excellent. Chris, I want to say thank you so much for joining us today. It was a great interview. I took a lot of notes, and I'm looking forward to our next conversation. Thanks for being on the show.

Christopher Audette 23:43
Thank you so much for having me, Umar. It was a pleasure.

Umar Hameed 23:50
If you enjoyed this episode, please go to iTunes and leave a five-star rating. And if you're looking for more tools, go to my website at nolimitsselling.com. I've got a free mind training course there, that's going to teach you some insights from the world of neuro-linguistic programming and that is the fastest way to get better results.


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